Cork has its say on rise in AI romance

A further 12% say they wouldn’t rule it out, and one in five believe such romances would be less complicated than human ones.

Men are twice as likely as women to engage in AI relationships — 13% compared to 7%.

Mental health charity Turn2Me warns the trend reflects a “loneliness pandemic” in Ireland, fuelled by Covid, the housing shortage, and the rising cost of dating. They caution that relying on AI for emotional fulfilment could deepen isolation, harm mental health, and strip away the richness of real human relationships.

“Humans are a social species; we are tribal in nature,” said Fiona O’Malley, CEO of Turn2Me. “Numerous studies show loneliness can lead to serious health issues.”

The Cork Independent took to the streets to find out if people see this as a passing fad — or a real threat to how we connect.

Joyal Joy, a 22 year old student from India, is quite sceptical about forming bonds with AI, despite studying computer science and planning to become an IT engineer.

“I think it's not a good thing. Relationships should be human — it is all about how we feel, what we express. AI was taught what to say. It doesn’t have emotions, no commitments either. I see it as a danger for humanity.”

Ryan Daly, a 33 year old writer, shares a broader perspective: “People crave a connection they're not getting in person anymore. Obviously, our attention has been captured by three or four big companies, and we make big numbers for them — our output creates ad revenue, data — so it’s their job to get us hooked online. That probably led to our lack of connection in person. We seek comfort. It's easier to sit on the couch looking at your phone than to go out. It's the people who pull the strings and have the power over our attention, and where attention goes, money flows.

“AI definitely has potential to progress if in the right hands. It's the responsibility of governments and our leaders to manage it well. It's going to affect people's critical thinking and decision-making skills.”

A couple from Germany visiting Cork also share their scepticism about AI romance. Canan Saydam, 27, a sales manager, said: “I don't think that you can have a real relationship with a machine due to the fact that there are no emotions. A machine cannot convey any emotions like a human being.”

Her partner, Timo Stiels, a 32 year old calculation engineer, added: “People go for AI relations probably because they are afraid to get rejected by a human. I think we see this in Japan already — the population is shrinking, and they have difficulties forming families there.”

Nicole Leeson McCarthy, a 22 year old UCC student studying chemistry, is convinced that nothing can replace the real chemistry between humans.

“I believe there's been a lot of loneliness since Covid and people feel more disconnected. Many now are working from home. If someone is trying to connect to a robot, then it's going to be more difficult for them in the future to actually connect with people in real life, and it's going to cause more seclusion. I think it's a dangerous road to go down. Some people are using AI for therapy as well, and it just regurgitates your own parts back to you. It's not really bringing anything new to the conversation — it's just what you've said to it, saying it back. That leads to an echo chamber in your own head, which could lead to depression or, on the opposite side, inflate your ego.”

Michael H, a 57 year old tourist from England who used to work in finance, does not see AI romance as an outright danger to humanity, but has concerns. “The problem that you're going to have is that AI, machine learning, and large language models are predisposed within guidelines to be agreeable, in a way that encourages engagement. So, the issue I see is that if people are practising with such AI — humans, boyfriends, girlfriends, whatever — it's not going to be like the real thing, because in reality, relationships are not logical or easy. You have to work on it from both sides.

“I think people should be aware of the differences. It could be troublesome. I wouldn't maybe go so far as to say it's a danger — I think that could be a bit overreaching.”

Maria Carolina Martins, a Brazilian psychologist living in Ireland, voiced concerns about AI, particularly in the field of therapy. “These relationships are not real, so what is the point of having them? I think there should be a way to show people that a relationship with a machine is not healthy. Human relationships are not easy, but at least they are real. People also turn to AI for therapy, but how can a machine provide serious assistance if it doesn’t have, or cannot fully read human emotions?”

Students Niamh and Saoirse find the survey results a bit hard to believe.

Niamh O’Connor, 21, a music student at UCC: “It's a bit dystopian. Like, it's something that you'd see in movies in like, like a few years ago, that would happen in the future that you kind of laugh at. So it's kind of crazy and scary that's actually happening.”

Saoirse Cronin, an MTU student studying marketing: “I don't know anyone who's doing that. Loads of students are using AI for assignments. But having a romantic relationship with it — I didn't think that would be taking place in Ireland,” she said.